Sunday, October 30, 2011

Out of It No More

I've been so completely out of it lately.  So much has been going on I can hardly keep my head straight it seems.  I've been burdened with a lot of worry...a bit of fear...and it has totally taken over me.  I've never had this experience before.  And I've come to a point where, unfortunately, I have shut down.  It's hard for me to put my heart into anything but my family.  At least, I guess, I feel like I can put heart into them.  I've really really struggled.

Then, today, something clicked.  I talked to a friend and began to cry a little.  Surprisingly, it helped.  I also taught a lesson in Young Women.  It went well.  In fact, it was fantastic...if not for them, for me.  Afterward, I held a presidency meeting with our class presidency.  This is something I've been wanting to do for a very long time, but today, we started and set up a schedule to do it regularly.  Today we celebrated Scotty's birthday and played with Nathaniel.  I talked to my mom on the phone.  And I started looking for a house for rent for a family moving here from Michigan.  I accomplished good things today.  And it made a difference. 

A few times last week I logged on to update our blog and almost immediately logged out.  I didn't have anything to say...even though I did.  humph  Anyway, now I'm back in the swing of things.  No more Ms. Out-of-it.  I think I've turned a corner and am ready to live again.  And it feels good (or at least, better).

1 comment:

hilary said...

Hugs to you Jenny. I've been the same lately too. You are fantastic, whether you are out of it or not.


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