In my short (almost) 30 years, I have found that there are a lot of questions to be asked. I have some of the answers. But more often than not, I find that others have the answers that I'm in need of. And usually, I find out who has my answer after on-my-knees, pleading prayer. And always (so far), I find the people who have answers to my hardest, most life-altering questions after a lot of prayer. Not just some...but a heckuva-lotta prayer.
Samantha has been an area of concern for me, well, her entire earthly existence. Certainly there were the ups and downs because of health-related issues. But, no matter how "great" things are going, I always wonder about...and have concern for...her future. I have felt time and again that there is more to this little girl than what she is able to show us...that there is more for us to see here, while she is living and with us, on this earth. My faith enables me to immediately believe, and know, that more understanding will be given to us after this life...but I honestly believe that there is more HERE that we will see. Though we have seen many miracles in Sammy's life, I believe there is more to be witnessed.
So I pray. We are c o n s t a n t l y praying. And I pray that we will find what it is that will help her achieve her full potential here. And after this life, when she is resurrected into a perfect, beautiful little bundle of Sammy-Sam...she will be perfect. And here, I will be able to do all I can, as her mother, to help her achieve what she was -- is -- meant to accomplish and achieve.
About 2 weeks ago I had a conversation with a friend. I am tutoring her son, and she was telling me what some of his difficulties are in school. This discussion, led to a discussion about learning, in general. (I also am constantly praying that I will be able to help Callie develop her mind and talents as much as she can. You see, I feel like I have 2 children on opposite ends of the spectrum. Sammy is definitely way behind, while Callie is achieving far beyond her age. I am constantly looking for things that will continue to stimulate her and make her happy in learning.) My friend introduced me to a program (which once we really get rolling I'll blog about), and Callie is loving it. This program led me to another program that I feel is an answer to my prayers -- for Samantha.
We are in the early early early stages. All my projects are on hold until I read about 1,000,000 books. But we are meeting with a clinician who works in this certain field. That meeting will be sometime in June or July. She is the only clinician outside of Philadelphia, PA who does this...and she just happens to come to San Jose, CA every 6 months to follow-up on patients she has here.
We are in San Jose for a reason. We are living with Marcus' parents for a reason -- sure to save money...but also to be in this ward, so I could connect with this friend I've made, so she could connect me to this program, that connected me to a woman in our stake who has used it with FOUR of her special needs children, whose cousin is the only clinician outside of Philadelphia who sets up individual plans for these kiddos and comes to SAN JOSE every SIX MONTHS so she can help her cousin's kids...but in the meantime has created a clientele here...I mean, really people. The Lord often provides answers to our questions and concerns through others. And I'm so grateful for it.
Now, we haven't officially begun, as I've previously mentioned. But both Marcus and I are so excited. I'm reading during any free time I have and we're trying to save as much money as I can to pay for it...but I believe that this will greatly benefit our little sammy-sam...and of course, I'll be writing more on this topic as things unfold. It's so early I'm not quite ready to generally blog about the program, but the more information I get, the more I'll share, as it's a program that can benefit ANY child.