Friday, April 29, 2011

Life Continues...

I will be among the many -- or thousands -- who blog about the Prince and Duchess today.  The Royal Wedding.  How fabulous.  I decided not to wake up early since I went to bed so late.  But, I'm relying on Scotty and Annie to have recorded it for me.  I did, however, catch Good Morning America this morning when I woke up with Samantha, and I have to say, I thought Kate, now Catherine, looked  beautiful.  I'm all for the natural look.  Loved her hair and that gorgeous veil (I'm a veil girl)...the lace sleeves.  As if my opinion matters...I say "nicely done."  If I never get to watch the recorded wedding, then I'll watch it on their 10 year anniversay when it's rebroadcasted...like I did as a little girl watching Princess Diana marry Prince Charles.  Marcus thinks William and Kate will divorce.  I sure hope not.  I want them to be the Nicole Kidman/Tom Cruise...wait...how about the Jennifer Aniston/Brad Pitt....uh....are they really doomed?  I sure hope not.  The romantic in me still believes they'll hang on like Lucille and Desi...ahhhh.  Enough.  No more.  I see a future similar to that of Danny DeVito and Rhea Perlman!  That's right.  Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson.  Will and Jada Smith...now that's what I'm talking about.  Kevin and Kyra.  Ok ok ok

I'm at the hospital today with Nathaniel.  He's doing better, though he's still heavily sedated.  It reminds me of moments in the hospital with Samantha, but this is something that Marcus and I never had to experience -- weeks in the hospital.  I feel for Scotty and Annie.

Plans for Sweatin' for Sammy are moving forward.  I can't believe it's so soon.  A woman from the newspaper came and did an interview.  She's writing an article about Samantha.  A photographer is coming on Saturday to take pictures of her.  Wow.  This seems so unreal.

I'm continuing to do what I can to prepare for Girls' Camp.  I'm excited to be one of the assistant directors, but it is one more thing to think about right now.  I'm confident in the young women I'm working with, though, so it'll all come together fine.

I take back Nathaniel being heavily sedated.  He's heavily medicated, but I just spent 15 minutes holding his hand and stroking his hair.  Everytime I stopped, he squirmed.

Callie went had a rough week last week, but the past few days she's been so sweet.  She has been actively playing and trying to engage with Samantha more.  I guess she always has, but it's just different.  It's almost as if she's matured.  Why does saying that make me tear up?  But she has.  She more clearly understands Samantha.  She jokes with her and Sammy smiles back.  Callie knows how to play differently with Samantha.  She doesn't want Samantha to go to school in the mornings because she wants her around.  It's so great to see their relationship deepen.  I love Callie.  She makes me smile every morning when she wakes up, comes in the room and says, "Good Mooooorning." 

Life continues to move on.  I feel like I've been going at a frantic pace for so long.  I'm not keeping up with everything I had hoped to.  My book is on hold the past little bit as I try to be there for my own family and extended family.  But, I'm ok with that. 

Ok...time to help out again...

Monday, April 25, 2011

Down Payment -- Paid

I've been in a constant state of stress the past couple weeks.  I feel like there's so much I'm juggling, and the balls keep falling ... as much as I try to keep them up in the air.  It's really not that bad, but I could be less-stressed...we'll put it that way.

One huge thing checked off my "To Do" list is secure Samantha's therapy session at Now I Can.  And, ladies and gentleman, without further ado -- I hearby announce to the world that Samantha is officially attending intensive physical therapy at Now I Can in Orem, Utah for September 19 - October 7.  And we are so excited.  That $700 reservation fee came from our dear friends and family who attended Chevy's and who are continually giving giving giving.  We love you and can't wait for you to see Samantha in October.  Trust me, there will be video!

Friday, April 22, 2011

The Park

Callie and I get to spend a lot of time together.  As much as I would have liked another baby by now, I feel I've been blessed to have so much one on one time with my little girl.  Though Samantha gets special treatment -- let's just face it, it's true -- and attention because of all these different therapies, etc, Callie gets her share of attention and love.  It's just different. 

So, what are some things that I get to do with Callie?  One thing we both like to do (and she LOVES to do) is go to the park.  Callie is so adventurous and fun.  And she can climb up any jungle gym like it's nothin'.  The girl is amazing to watch, and she's been this way since she was a baby...just wants to jump in and do it.  She's so agile; she's fun to watch.  Once a week I try to go to the park with other ladies and their kids from church, but that doesn't always happen.  No matter what though, we get to the park.  One of the many things we do together.  I love you Callie Belle.

Oh happy day

Shoveling with Wyatt

hmm Maybe the park is more about Wyatt than the slides.  Check out this stud!

I love that spring is in full force.  Look at the color.  It makes me happy.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

For the Love of a Child: The Journey of Adoption by Monica L. Blume

I've been wanting to read this book for awhile now. I felt it was time to read it. It's a book I knew I wanted to have on our bookshelf -- for that day when Callie is 16 and has certain questions...the day when she just wants to read about adoption in her attempt to get some answers and figure things out in her own mind. I thought this would be a good resource for the entire family.

So, I bought and read the book. It was a good book, though different than what I expected for some reason. It was filled with interesting statistics and facts that I thought were important, and, well, interesting. The first part of the book is written by Monica, as an LDS Family Services caseworker. Though it was interesting (gosh, can't I think of a better word here?), I felt some of it was repetitive. I attribute that, however, to reading this while I worked out, having a harder time focusing, and being overall too busy. So, perhaps I wasn't in "the zone" as I read it. The second portion of the book is written by adoptive parents, birthparents, extended families on both sides, and those children who have been adopted. To me, this was the best part of the book. And, again, maybe it's because it aligns with a project I'm currently working on and so it naturally interested me more. But reading these personalized stories and heartfelt accounts and testimonies -- that's what made the book so fantastic. The first part seemed to talk about why adoption was the best option in certain circumstances. I guess, I already have strong feelings about adoption, so maybe that's why it seemed redundant. It was the writing from the birthmothers and grandparents, etc that brought it home. It's a good book, and I think it's a good book to have on our shelves.

It's a fantastic book, however, for those who are struggling with the idea of adoption -- who are struggling to decide their overall stance on adoption, for those who are trying to decide if they should choose adoption for their unborn baby, and for those trying to decide if adoption is the right path for them in creating their family. It is certainly a great book for family members who want to be supportive to the pregnant woman in their family choosing to place her baby for adoption, and for the family members who will be welcoming a baby into their home through adoption.

Make-up Troubles

A few weeks ago, Analisa had a friend visiting.  Callie and Sammy's room (aka Bryan's bedroom) was now occupied, and Analisa generously offered to have them both sleep in her room.  And here the story begins...

One night after putting Callie to bed, he heard some noises.  He went in to see this:

Is Callie preparing for a battle?  Perhaps.  But, what we do know is that Analisa's makeup has used by this fine lass and it was a mess.  Try disciplining your child when she looks like this...and try explaining to her that we need to take a picture of it so we can remember that this isn't what we do.  Try doing all of that with a straight face at 11pm.  It's not easy.  But after the inital sternness, we had some smiles.  I mean, she couldn't help it.  She thought she looked pretty great. 






Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Ready and Waiting

Not too long ago Marcus and I received an email.  It was regarding a young woman who was pregnant and interested in getting more information, possibly even speaking over the phone.  It was an exciting thought, however, I had just finished reading a book about adoption, which reminded me that this process is that...a process for all involved.  I immediately made the assumption that there were several families she was probably considering.  I'm glad I did.  We never made contact.  I can safely assume that this young woman has chosen another family.  And that's ok.  It really is.  In fact, I found myself praying for her, that she would find the right home for her baby...and it was sincere.  I wanted her to find her baby's family...not be persuaded to choose us somehow.  It was a sincere, true charitable love that I felt for her -- a concern for both she and her baby.  Anyway.

That email came at a time when I was terribly frustrated with our current adoption situation.  At times it feels like things are just taking too long.  I'm 30 (I know, I'm still young...blah blah blah), have 2 kids, and if I want a big family -- which I do -- then we got to get crackin' here.  But then, sadly, I realize that what I ought to be thinking is "If Heavenly Father has a big family planned for me..." instead of what I want.  And, that can make me even sadder considering the possibility that what I want is so far from what Heavenly Father wants for me.  (sigh)  So, I was stuck in these kinds of thoughts when we got this email.  That email was enough to boost my spirits.  I began to feel like there was hope.  After all, someone was looking at our profile...maybe our birthmother will too. 

The problem is, it's now been a couple weeks, and I get sad from time to time.  I'm extremely busy, which is good I suppose.  But I want another baby.  I wonder how that would work with everything going on.  How could we possibly have another baby?  But it's right, ya know?  I have found myself checking the email account that we rarely use but the one that we received the adoption email on, multiple times a day...just in case. 

The day will come when I hold a baby in my arms again.  I will brush his or her hair, and feel the soft baby skin.  I'll look into her eyes and wonder if it's possible for this little baby to comprehend how blessed I feel, and how full of love I am.  I'll teach Callie to properly hold her new sibling and indulge her mothering side.  I'll introduce Samantha to her new brother or sister and wait patiently as she begins to understand that this baby is stickin' around for a good long ever.  We'll smell baby lotion and formula.  There will be stinky diapers and funny pictures.  And most definitely, Marcus and I will sleep less...but love more.

I think we're ready...and waiting.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Bum-Deal Bro


emily maynard and brad womack on After the Final Rose

Wow!  Did not see this split coming.
for any of you who are unsure, this is full of sarcasm.

I didn't follow the show, but watching this episode was tragic.  I mean, really.  It was obvious that these 2 were not going to make it.  And as silly as I think the show is, I like the idea of happiness and love...no matter where you find it.  I mean, being happy is a good thing.  And finding love is a good thing.  So, if somehow some couple does get beyond the ostentatious bachelor with extravagant dates and vacations (that no real person could afford on their own) and and and...then great.  I'd like people to be happy.  It does, however, come as no surprise to me when these "engagements" don't work out.  A real part of me feels bad for them -- for the time wasted in their attempt to find "the one" but, oh well.  Why I feel compelled to share my opinion on this, I'm not sure. 

Monday, April 18, 2011

My Little Callie


Such a sweet, spunky, crazy, tender, loving, adventurous, cunning, funny, and sometimes devious little girl.  I love my little Callie.

Friday, April 15, 2011

Nater Potater

I've been thinking about Naters a lot lately.  Little Nate is my nephew.  He's one cute kid, and I feel especially fond of this guy 'cause he kind of likes me...plus, I'm excited for Sammy and Callie to have a "Green" cousin.  Long story short, Nate's had some breathing issues and had surgery to "fix" what they could.  This past week, Nate got a cold...and stopped breathing.  He's been in the hospital for the past few days.  I went and saw him the other night, and even under that mask, he's one cute kid.

I've also been thinking a lot about Samantha. I know Nate's going to be ok -- or have a hunch that he will be.  But, that doesn't make things easier NOW.  Well, sometimes it can, but still.

When Samantha was born, we knew she had a small head.  We knew the doctor in the hospital said she'd be a vegetable.  But 3 months later we met with a geneticist who had researched the diagnosis and all things said she'd live a pretty normal life and we were specifically told that she wouldn't have seizures.  I thought I'd just have a delayed baby...when I cried leaving the geneticist's office, it was because I thought Samantha wouldn't go to the Prom or play soccer...or get married or wahtever, because she'd be developmentally delayed.  Shallow, but whatever.  4 months later, our lives went out of control.  For 7 months we took shifts sleeping on the coach with her at night -- we were functioning zombies during the day, and at night we were on duty.  Every other week we were giving her Diastat (valium) because her seizures wouldn't stop (at about $600 a pop).  We had many hospital stays.  Marcus couldn't take time off work and so I was there alone often.  I didn't see Marcus much, and he was worried sick about Samantha because he couldn't be with her.  Once, I had to give Samantha CPR on our family room floor because I could not get her to breathe after a seizure.  I'm not sure how I knew what to do...but she started breathing again.  Once, in the hospital, they couldn't stop her from seizing -- this is an experience that reminds me of Nate just this last week -- and a team rushed in to try to get her to breath.  I'm not sure how many doses of medication they gave her to try to get her to stop.  She ws blue.  And you know it's bad when they say we may want to leave.  I'm not sure why, but my mom was in town.  Marcus was rarely in the hospital with me and so I think it was easier for me to hold it together.  But with my mom there, and watching they give Samantha CPR with so many people in the room that I coudln't even see her anymore...that scared me.  I thought we were done.  I really honestly did.  I thought I was watching her final moments.  I lost it, and my mom had a hard time keeping it together herself.  That pediatric unit knew us well.  From that point on, when we looked at housing, I always made sure we were only a few blocks from a hospital because I knew we couldn't afford an ambulence, but I also knew we had taken too many trips to count of rushing to the hospital while she was having a seizure.  It's stressful and tiring and scary.  But, it also creates this deep deep love and you realize that there's not anything you wouldn't do for your child.

While talking about Nathaniel, I told Marcus, while crossing my fingers, that I'm glad our hospital days are over.  Samantha's seizures are improving and relatively under control, so I'm just hoping we're done with that phase.


What's my point? On some level, we get it.  It's exhausting and painful and so so sad to see any little baby -- and your own for goodness sake -- go through something like this.  Neal A. Maxwell went through many trials in his life.  While reading his biography during college, I was struck with something in there that he said.  He made the statement that sometimes the only reason we go through trials is so we can empathize with others.  That struck me.  And I have never forgotten it.  In the midst of some trials, sometimes I stop and think of that...and I wonder who I will empathize with later in life.  While we were going through the craziest part of Samantha's life, I was just trying to emotionally survive and get Samantha to physically survive.  Later, as families and other parents talked to me about their situations, I realized that our experience could help others, just by listening and being able to nod my head in that "I know what you mean" kind of way.  I never once thought that I'd be empathizing with my own family.  I never suspected my cute smiley little nephew to be rushed to the hospital in an ambulence and staying in the hospital because he couldn't breath.  There's not much I can do to help them right now, but for me, experiencing what we have, it makes me kind of feel good that I'm here -- just in case they need me to nod. 

Thursday, April 14, 2011

Cool or Creepy?

I saw this article today, and I don't know...it just seems a little weird to me.  I see flashes of Will Smith fighting off out of control "friendly" robots.  hmmm  Conceptually, it's pretty cool, but overall, I felt creeped out. 

Against the Window



Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Excuse You...


Yes, I had to put Callie in time out yesterday for burping. Now, normally, a burp is a burp. Ok, no problem. Say "excuse me" and you're good...for the most part. But recently Callie has discovered how to make herself burp, and she loves it. She thinks it's funny. Ok, maybe we laughed the first time. Maybe I even laughed the second time. But this has been going on for weeks. She's starting to do it without even realizing it. What if her nervous twitch becomes burping?! How unbecoming of a young lady....


So yesterday, after ALL DAY of self-induced burps, I told her if she did it one more time, she was going to time out. Enough was enough. Only a few moments later, she sucked in some air and out came a little burp. "Callie!" She jumped. I really believe she didn't realize what she had done. "Callie, what just happened?" "I burped." "Ok, time out." She didn't fight it at all...just quietly walked to time out. (sigh)


We haven't had any incidents today, but really. Come on girl. I got to put my foot down on this one. If you aren't drinking loads of rootbeer at a sleepover, or trying to burp the alphabet, we got to draw the line.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Chevy's Success

For those who have not heard, our Chevy's fundrasier for Samantha this past Thursday was an incredible success.  I was so overwhelmed at the outpouring of love and support for our little girl.  Many who could not attend sent checks or cash as a way to show their support.  Some ate at Chevy's for lunch and dinner!  You guys are incredible.  We have amazing friends.  But, also, for those who didn't even know us but came anyway...wow.  And thank you!

I had told Chevy's that I thought there would be a lot of people.  I'm not sure they believed me.  They were understaffed for lunch, so our friends politely waited.  Take-outs were abundant!  And dinner.  Woa, let's just talk about dinner.  I couldn't believe how many people were there.  Thank you thank you thank you!!!  We didn't eat dinner that night, just showed up and talked with people.  As I said earlier, it was an overwhelming experience to be surrounded by those we know and love, and to meet new people who wanted to know more about Samantha and this cause they were helping.  Fantastic and humbling.

This was a difficult fundraiser for me.  Back in high school, I led a lot of fundraisers, but never one for my own family.  I wasn't sure what to expect.  During a time when I've felt frustrated and discouraged about different things, I have felt the love of the Lord through the hundreds of people who have been rallying around Samantha and our family.  It's a feeling I've only felt once before this stronly -- the morning we sat in the "family waiting room" while Samantha had her head surgery.  At that time, when I was struck with panic and fear, I felt myself be lifted up in a way that felt as if I was physically being lifted in my seat.  I attribute that experience almost 5 years ago to the prayers of our friends and family -- many of who were at Chevy's last Thursday.

There is no way I can thank everyone personally who attended or ordered food that day.  So, in a small attempt to express our thanks, I had thank you notes on all the tables with a family picture.  At the front desk, there was another thank you note...unfortunately at dinner the manager didn't pass them out like they did at lunch (at lunch, the waiters put slid the notes in with the checks).  I don't have a copy of those notes anymore...I wish I did so I could put it in Samantha's scrapbook -- but for those who attended, thank you from the bottom of our hearts. 

And, for those who are curious.  That day, we brought in almost $4,000 worth of business to Chevy's.  That means, Samantha will receive a check of $989.33 towards her therapy!  Chevy's was very happy -- they even want to do it again for us in June.  I think we'll pass, but it was flattering nonetheless.

 

Friday, April 8, 2011

I Am a Mom


I wake up at 3am when my child yells out

I curl up in bed with them and will sleep the rest of the night by her side

I clean up the icky, oozing aftermath of sneezes

I make breakfasts, lunches, and most dinners

I "try" to keep an organized environment

I play outside

I play horsey

I kiss puppies and blankies goodnight after kissing my own sweet little girl goodnight

I say morning prayers

I get frustrated trying to keep children reverent during prayers

I act out scripture stories

I sing songs about smelly feet and ears that hang low

I sing songs about smelly feet and ears that hang low...and like it

I miss relaxing and reading a book in the middle of the day

I love sitting and reading a book to my kids in the middle of the day

I don't exercise enough

I eat macaroni and cheese and hotdogs

I compare myself to cheese, and hope with age comes delectable goodness because...

I've aged quite a bit in the last 5 years! (yikes)

I don't sleep enough

I braid hair

I dress my kids

I redress my kids several times a day

I change diapers

I administer medicine

I fast and pray

I study

I spend too much money on what I consider silly things

I write little notes and put them in mailboxes for my kids

I decorate

(hopefully) I educate

I cry more than I ever have before motherhood

I stress out

I cheer on my kids in their individual activities

I pretend to eat my kids brains so they laugh

I tickle

I crawl

I chase

I run

I push doll strollers on walks with my daughter

I take pictures

I carry rocks in my pockets and large "cooool" leaves in my hands

I jump out of dark rooms and laugh hysterically with them as they scream!

I find joy in the little things -- but also don't know how to let some of the little things go

I worry about the future and try to prepare them the best I can.

I paint nails, wash bodies, go to doctor appointments, drive to school, and plan play dates.

I cry watching commercials, youtube videos, and news reports thinking of my girls

I never knew how much I could love

I am a mom -- and I'm happier than I could have imagined.


The list could go on, and on...

I want to start the journey again, and I'll happily wait until I can.

Until then, I'm still Samantha and Callie's mom forever, and that makes me pretty excited.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Why I Like Busy

I'm a busy person.  I always have been.  It's the way I roll.

It has caused some problems in my life -- stress, weight gain, zits.  Whatever.  But that happens when I over-do it.  I haven't learned my lesson about overdoing it quite yet, but I think I'm learning.  My problem is, I love being busy.  I love feeling productive.  I love being a part of something that I feel passionately about.  And, I feel passionately about a lot of things. 

Passion #1:  Callie
I mean, seriously.  Check this babe out.  Look at that smile and that beautiful glowing skin.  Callie is my bud.  We get into little "disagreements" at times, but we're pretty close.  She brings me a lot of true joy during the day.  Even on the rough days, we laugh together and she continually reminds me that she loves me.  How can you not be passionate about a lady like this?  Callie, I love you to the moon and back and you're my gal.  In this category, I'd like to add adoption.  I'm pretty passionate about that subject as well.  It has changed my life forever and I look forward to the other children that Heavenly Father has waiting for us via adoption.  I look forward to our lives being touched by another birthmom.  I'm looking forward to our future with adoption.  So, yeah, I feel strongly about Callie and how she came to us. 

Passion #2:  Samantha
Hello!  Look at those little water shoes.  This little bug is one tough cookie and there aren't really words to explain all that she has taught me.  I've grown in innumerable ways because of Samantha and her life story.  She's a gem.  Samantha and Callie are a perfect match together.  They were meant for each other, and we were all meant for Sammy.  Lately, we've been doing a lot of fundraising and my heart has been overflowing with gratitude and love.  I had an idea, but I didn't realize how many people really loved our little girl.  I'm passionate about doing whatever I need to in order to help her achieve her potential here on this earth.  I'm passionate about her therapy, education, and all things Samantha.

Passion #3:  Marcus
Ok, Marcus isn't a geek, he's a nerd.  But, this works too.  I love Marcus.  He's my hunk 'a burnin' love.  He makes me laugh with his corny jokes (most of the time) and he's just the guy I want to be around.  I'm passionate about Marcus because he's my number one.  I know I should be better at letting him know that, but I can't imagine my life without him.  He's an incredible dad and, if it's possible, and even better husband. 

We've had a lot going on lately. 
Tonight we had a fundraiser for Samantha's therapy (which, I think, went amazingly well!). 
We have a 5K planned for May.
We are waiting for a/our baby.
I'm writing a book and plan to submit it, hopefully, in May/June.
I've volunteered myself to advocate for Independence Network (a special needs program for adults that needs to remain in the county)
I'm one of the Assistant Directors for Girls' Camp this year (more on this later)
I'm in the YW Presidency
And then there's the usual everyday stuff. 

I'm busy.  We're busy.  But busy does something to me that I like.  Yes, I talked about the feeling of accomplishment and self-esteem boost that I get...but there is frustration in every single area of my life if I allow it.  Let's take adoption, for instance.  We want a baby.  It's the truth.  And I'm starting to get all weird about babies -- wanting to hold them all the time, stroking their cute little hair on their cute little heads...I'm going all weirdo.  I imagine teaching Callie how to properly hold a baby.  I imagine Samantha getting a little smile every time a new baby lets out a cry.  That Samantha -- so compassionate.  I imagine Marcus being a proud new daddy again.  But, when I'm busy, I don't complain as much to myself, because, who has time?  I still have my moments, and last week was particularly hard for me...but in general, when I'm busy and immerse myself in working on my projects or committees, or whatever, I tend to find more joy in my life. 

That's why I like busy.  That's why I do all the stuff that I do.  It helps me feel joy because I don't dwell on the many frustrations that come with feeling so passionately about certain things in my life.  Now, learning how to balance my busy, that's another story....

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Catchy Phrase

Well...after some discussion and some pretty awesome suggestions...I think Marcus and I came up with a little phrase that we like for the 5K (if this really happens.  there were a few kinks with the city, but we are working them out -- hopefully.  i'll keep you posted)

We wanted something fun (not too dramatic) that had a little ring to it.  We tried to do some alliteration...played around with a few things...laughed...and we came up with:

Sweatin' for Sammy

So, whether people will be running or walking...it's all because they love little Sammy.  Even if they don't know her but only come because a friend roped them in...that friend is coming and still sweatin' for Sammy.  Right?  Anyway.  We're excited to get going.  I hope this all works out. 

Last night thinking about it, I got a little emotional thinking about all of us there, for Samantha.  I was telling Marcus some of the updates from our friend who is organizing it, telling him it didn't look so good.  He said, "Jenny, can you imagine it though?  I mean, everyone would be there for her...cheering her on...wearing shirts for her...it's something we would NEVER forget."  It would be pretty amazing.  Lately, we've read some information about Samantha's diagnosis and her profile match up with some things related to early death.  It's been hard for us.  We've had to rely on our faith (and doctor's opinion -- who can't ever be 100% anyway) to find peace about everything.  And, let me clarify here: We're not expecting her to die tomorrow or even next year.  She very well would be a young adult if she matches up with these cases.  So, last night I was thinking about that -- and if we were able to do this run, how cool of a memory would that be one day?  I don't know.  I said we didn't want our little logo to be dramatic, and listen to me now.  Anyway...

We'll keep you all posted on if/when this thing goes down. 

Monday, April 4, 2011

what would you do?

Say someone wanted to do a 5K for your child, to raise money for a therapy, and you were responsible to come up with a logo of sorts for the t-shirts.  (sigh)  Say you were also someone who wasn't all that creative, so the pressure of this somewhat sent you into a whirlwind of confusion.  (SIGH)  I'm so excited about the prospect of this, but I really don't know where to begin. 

Where would you start? 
What images do you think of when you think of Samantha?
What's a phrase that's catchy and ... good?

Any input, at this point, is much appreciated and very beneficial.  Now I Can already uses "Running to Walk" for their annual 5K...which I love.  But...hmmm.  Ideas I have thus far:

"Team Sammy"
"Team Samantha"
"Team Sammer Jammer"
"One Little Girl Leaving a Big Footprint on the World"
"Running for the Samsquatch"
"Run for the Jammer"
"Little Head, Big Heart"  (um, ok, maybe not)  But we could say...
"Little Legs, Big Heart"  (I don't like that much either)

or...how about...

Running for a Miracle, Running for Sammy

oh.  i need help.

(Sigh)

I'm not even sure where to begin. I've had a million thoughts lately, but no time to sit and write them out. Things are going well, though I went through a funk last week. It could have been all the stress on top of -- what? I don't know. But, things are looking up and I'm still happy about life. I was grateful for General Conference this year. This sounds so pathetic, but I was actually awake the entire time and caught every single talk. Well, I think so anyway. I may have missed one while I was laying Callie down for her nap -- yeah, Elder Oaks. I'm grateful for family. I like them. And, I'm grateful just for so much right now. I'm grateful for the many who have extended themselves for us lately, on behalf of Samantha and raising money for her therapy. I'm so excited about this therapy and really believe in it. So, here's one more....

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